The Good Trauma Fairy
An Excerpt from Tara’s Brach’s talk “Facing Fear in a Traumatized World”
The little girl exclaims, “Help, I can’t take it anymore!”
Then she opens her eyes and sees a fairy in a haze of blue with a glittering wand. She lets the fairy know how her father’s been beating her, how her mother doesn’t help, and how she feels they both wish she was dead.
The fairy listens with tears in her eyes, then tells her that while she can’t make all the pain and fear disappear, she can help her get through this time. She can help her forget — and then remember later, when she is able to handle it.
With a wave of her wand, the Good Fairy says, “I’m going to send things into different parts of your body, and they are going to hold them for you until you feel strong enough to let them move freely again.”
She explains that she’s going to tighten the little girl’s pelvis and belly, and she’s going to constrict her heart and throat to protect her from feeling the raw intensity of the hurt, fear, and broken-heartedness.
She says, “You will have trouble feeling and being close to people, but it will be your way of surviving. And at those times that the pain erupts, you will find your own ways to control it. Ways that may not look good to the world, that you may judge yourself for, but they will be of temporary comfort.
“And you, my darling, will be a fairly functional human being in spite of all this, because you have a strong mind and you can hold this all in. And I will be helping you.”
The child, looking directly into the fairy’s eyes, asks, “How will you help? Will you come back to see me?”
“You will not forget everything. I will leave a voice inside you that will urge you to reconnect with your whole self. It may be a very long process. But in time, you will feel an urge and calling to step out of imprisoning beliefs.
“To unwind your body and release what it’s been holding all of these years. You will learn the art of sacred presence. There will be physical and emotional pain as you open, but you will have what you need — the compassion and wisdom, the support of loving others — to be a whole person, to be spiritually awake but still the same.
“This is because your soul has always been there. Just hidden by the scars of this lifetime.”
The Good Fairy puts her arm around the child’s shoulders and gently leads her into bed. She waves her wand and stands by until the girl finally relaxes into a deep sleep.
She gazes tenderly at the small, innocent face and whispers her goodbye.
“When you wake up, you will forget I was here. You will forget you asked for help. You will forget the sharpness of your daily pain.
“This is the only way I know to get you through this.
“You are a beautiful child. I love you. And in fact, your parents love you, even though they are incapable of showing you.
“You will have to love yourself enough to heal so that when you are older, your life will be powerful, full, and free.
“One day, you will know who you really are. You will trust your goodness and know your belonging.
“Until then, and for always, I love you.”
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