The secret to transformation that *works*
(nature doesn’t heal in one move ♟️)
For years, I was looking for the thing that would finally change my life.
The method.
The ceremony.
The insight that would make everything fall into place.
It's easy to love the fantasy of the silver bullet...
And honestly, sometimes it is real, at least that’s what we think.
In the West, if you come to the allopathic doctor with a problem, in general, you’ll often be offered an intervention to reduce symptoms fast.
I want to lose weight and it’s hard.
Try Ozempic.
I feel anxious and depressed.
Try this SSRI.
I have this skin condition that won’t go away, no matter what I try.
Try this steroid cream.
Honestly, sometimes I’m so grateful to Western medicine for its full-force, single-target solutions when it’s urgent. When I had malaria, three days of little white tablets turned a life-threatening infection into the miracle of feeling well again.
That’s the win of the 'silver bullet' approach: if you’ve identified the right target, change can be fast and dramatic.
But silver bullets tend to work best when the problem is relatively simple: a bacteria, a deficiency, a burn.
Most of what we're healing isn’t like that. It’s messy, complex and systemic. It lives in patterns with multiple causes, feedback loops and hidden variables.
Think...
Healing relationship glitches
Healing unfinished business from childhood
Overcoming the effects of trauma and healing the root pain
Occupying your purpose and making forward movement in life
Becoming abundant and flowing with money
Leading your life with power
Intimacy
Trusting life and feeling safe
For complex problems, the strategy that works is layering: several aligned interventions, none of which has to be ‘the one’ but together they shift the whole system over time.
We love to find the new thing and believe, this is going to change EVERYTHING!
That’s the silver bullet fantasy.
The mind loves simple answers, even when they are wrong. This can be driven by a part that wants control and relief now, to have it over and done with.
But complex systems don’t change that way.
There is no ‘one’ solution that’s going to solve most of the deeper challenges in your life. But there are a collection of aligned solutions that, over time, turn things around. This is layering.
It’s true that Internal Family Systems can help you integrate the obstacles that keep you stuck in patterns.
But you may still need movement, nourishing food, and a simple rhythm that stabilises your body.
It’s true that a powerful initiation or breakthrough can help you access clarity, power and a positive mind.
But without integration and daily practice, the shift often doesn’t hold.
It’s true that deep relational or somatic work can help you feel safe in your body and able to connect.
But tending to sleep, stress and physical health still matters.
It’s about layering.
Coming at the challenge from many angles, over time.
There are two essential ingredients for layering success:
#1 Be patient
One of my biggest challenges in my healing journey has been impatience.
If I wasn’t seeing results after so much time and energy, I’d be so disheartened. And because there is no six-step program with clear milestones, progress sometimes felt unclear and messy.
My impatience could undo me to the point of having a big ol’ tantrum that lasted days and damaged relationships.
Is this really working? I’m wasting my time. I’ll never be liberated!
What I’ve discovered is that all these things were helping. But slowly. They added up. They joined forces. They built a really solid base.
Unlike the allopathic medicine-esque three-day turnaround timeframes, these things work in nature’s timeframe. Slow. Steady. Happening.
Be patient. Take the next step.
#2 Focus
Sticking with it isn’t easy when it feels like you’re doing it all and your energy spreads too thin. Then there’s no focus.
It’s not about doing everything. Especially not the next fad on IG.
Follow your intuition. Move toward what you feel will heal you. Test it. Research it. Ask the universe to bring you the right guides. Trust your gut. Then give it your energy long enough to let it work.
And keep going.
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